Being that I haven’t posted in forever and a flipping day (or to be specific, since August of last year), I thought I’d write about lack of posting. Ha! Right? Anyway.
I’m sure with different people, different circumstances apply — but, for me, I’m in a season of life where things are chaotic and crazy — and the daily posting precedent I set when I first started this little blog (back in 2012… goodness! How time flies!) just wasn’t realistic. It wasn’t for me then, and it definitely isn’t realistic for me now.
I read a few great posts about getting back into blogging after a hiatus (you can check them out HERE, HERE, and HERE) and listened to THIS brilliant snippet of Ira glass, talking about storytelling, and decided to just get back into it. I think part of my struggle had to do with how I limited myself — primarily posting the recipes of baked goods. But at the time, that was my staple. I was known as “the baker” — at church, at work, within my group of friends.
And I’m going to be real with you here: when my mom got sick, my joy for baking started to fade. And after she died, it died too. My mom wasn’t the only person to teach me how to cook and bake, but she was the first. She used to lift me up on the counter top (so I could see), and let me “help” her make chocolate chip cookies. It’s one of my earliest and best memories. I’d sit and watch her measure the ingredients, then pour them in for her. She’d patiently let me stir the batter, crack eggs, dump in
way too many just the right amount of chocolate chips and put spoonfuls of dough onto a cookie sheet (while not so sneakily stuffing a good amount of it in face).
It’s been an interesting evolution since she passed away. I’ve watched myself go from someone who possessed certain qualities and enjoyed certain things — to someone different. When I talk about it, sometimes I describe myself as being “broken” after my mom died. Because I was. For months, I couldn’t function like I did before. Willing myself out of bed took a great deal of effort and getting through the day without crying felt like a triumph.
I’m not sharing this to make myself sound good or bad — or anything, really. I just want people to know this: if this emotional pain is your current reality, due to any circumstance, it’s okay. You’re not alone. It’s not forever. And it will get easier. I promise. It won’t happen quickly or all at once, but day by day — things do get better. Your world will get brighter. And while you’ll never be the person you once were, you’ll be better. A better version of yourself. And I believe that better version of you comes 1) from God and 2) from others. While it doesn’t ever get easier to understand why kind, amazing people experience great pain and sorrow — I will always be inspired by their strength, their faith, and their example to use their situations to help others (some of my favorite examples can be found HERE, HERE, and HERE).
So, anyway. Back to cookies and cake and pie. Or lack-thereof. I’m going to give an editorial calendar a try (love this post by Em for Marvelous HERE with free editorial calendar templates) — and hopefully start posting on the riggity reg. I’ll still share some dessert recipes, of course. But I’ll share some other recipes too, along with non-food things I love — like my family, my faith, organizing, crafting, and other awesomeness that helps me keep my house running (kind of) smoothly and my head on (sort of) strait.
Hope you’re well. Much love to you. Happy 2016!
P.S. – Look! A pony!